9.1 – The Great List of What’s Not Real

When I woke up it wasn’t the next day, but the day after that.  I knew I was supposta be at CFATTY’s for work, and they were calling me, but I didn’t call back.  I was also still Hungover, and didn’t have any Whatever-You-Drank-Two-Nights-Ago to cure it, but in another way I felt kinduv alrightcuz I knew The Great List of What’s Not Real…

I’m not The Bluebird, I’m just Jonathan.

 I’m not a MusicMan who MeToos via The Great List of Songs.  I just get mad when people don’t like the same songs as me.

I’m not a Reality Traveler cuz Reality Travel isn’t real.  I made it up cuz I was an insecure kid who wanted to feel more important. 

Everyone else I called Reality Travelers were also just insecure people who wanted to feel more important.

Wolf’s name isn’t really Wolf.  He doesn’t even really look like a wolf.  I just like animals a lot.

The Professor isn’t real.  I made up all the concepts and terminology and lessons of Reality Travel.

Reality Travel Training isn’t real.  I really went just went to graduate school.

Where-ThePlains-Meet-TheMountains is just a fancy way of saying Colorado.

The Crow repeatedly appearing inside places it shouldn’t have been was just a coincidence.

The Gods aren’t real.  Nothing created us and nothing cares if we’re destroyed. 

The OtherWorld isn’t real.  It’s just a hallucination caused by certain Perceptions, which are actually just drugs.

It’s impossible to TimeTravel.  You can only be in this present moment, which quickly vanishes forever.

The Goddess of Music isn’t real.  All songs from The Mix played during The Great Trip were just coincidences. I was not Touched and given The Gift, I was just naturally a good singer probably cuz of genetics.

The Goddess of Faith isn’t real.  She was just a fantasy of a woman who completely accepted me cuz no real woman ever has.

Because The Gods and The Goddess of Faith aren’t real, I will not get Eliminated for breaking God Rules and will continue to be alive.

Because Reality Travel isn’t real, I won’t even get The Malaise.

Because Reality Travel isn’t real, I didn’t break any Vow by going to War with The General&The Admiral, and they deserved to bleed.

The Professor would say The Great List of What’s Not Real is just a symptom of Big Doubt.  But like all other Reality Traveler BoobyTraps, Big Doubt is also not real.

7.17 – Shitshow

As the sing-along continued, Wolf summoned me and Scorpion into the kitchen.

“Well done, Bluebird,” Wolf said.  “I can’t believe I got the full blown Vertigo.  It was actually fascinating, like its own Perception.”

“I’m sorry,” Scorpion said.  “I underestimated the significance of this RealityFuck phenomenon.”

“It’s Alright,” Wolf said, “but now that all these Realities are together again, we have to maintain the MeTooing with a Common Perception at once.”

“I don’t feel comfortable doing any Perception with that Marijuana MeNotzie here,” Scorpion said.

“I’ve been watching him all night,” I said. “He’s had a lot of chances to be a MeNotzie but hasn’t.  In fact, I think he’s dying to MeToo with us.”

Then we looked back in the living room at him. The Baby was jumping up and down and clapping and had a big smile on his innocent puff-cheek face.

“I’ll admit he does look quite innocent,” Scorpion said.

“Yes,” Wolf scratched his chin, “I trust Bluebird’s assessment.”

“Alright,” Scorpion said.  “The only problem now is that we’re already deep into our own separate Perceptions.”

“There’s got to be something we can do tho,” Wolf said.

“Well,” Scorpion said.  “It’s a risk.  But we could try a having a Shitshow.”

“Of course!” Wolf said.

“What’s a Shitshow?” I asked.

“It’s a fringe theory of Perceptionism,” Wolf said, “suggesting if a Reality is at an extreme magnitude of a given Perception, or in other words Shitfaced, then they will be able to MeToo another Shitfaced Reality even if in a completely different Perception.  It’s unproven tho, and even if it did work, I’m not sure how to account for all these Sober Realities.”

“What if the Sober Realities get Shitfaced on a weak and unpowerful Perception like, say, Caffeine?” Scorpion suggested.

“I’ve still got a lot of Dr. Pepper in my car,” I said.

“Alright,” Wolf said, “we have no choice but to try.”

I left to get the Caffeine Perception, and when I got back Wolf was in the living room directing everything.  He had Emperor Penguin and The Penguins play every Marley song they knew, and Lamb kept everyone singing along.  WildFuckingTurkey was going around with bottles of Alcohol around and making sure everyone was drinking more than they could handle.

“Bluebird,” Wolf came up to me, “make sure the Sobers get fucking wired.”

“Alright,” I said.

Then I started handing out whole Dr. Peppers to each of them.

“I loveDr. Pepper,” The Baby said, “but I’m not allowed to have any too close to bedtime.”

“It’s Alright, The Baby,” I said.  “You can drink as much as you want after a Wedding.”

“Oh, alright!” he said and started happily suckling on his very own two liter Baby bottle.

Then Scorpion came back with The Marijuana Perception.  He was still cautious and trying to sneak the Octobong behind his back.  But the Baby saw it anyway.

“Hey!” he said. “What’s that cool looking Octopus thing?”

Scorpion was startled and was about to crawl right back into The Hole, but Wolf stopped him before he could.

“It’s alright,” he said, “just show him what it is.”

Then Scorpion brought it over, and The Baby started playing with it like it was new toy.

“What’s it for?” The Baby asked.

“You smoke Marijuana Perception out of it,” Scorpion said.

“I wanna try!”

“You do?”

“Yeah!”

The Scorpion sat next to The Baby and showed him which tentacle was which so you could smoke out of it.  The Baby took a hit and coughed and a minute later was giggling uncontrollably.

“I like it!” he said.

After that everyone in the room was inspired to try every Perception available at once.  I even took a couple more hits off the Octobong, and Emperor Penguin put some Dr. Pepper in his scotch.  Soon we were all Shitfaced, and the MeToos were flying around the room, and everyone got a chance to sit on The Throne.  Then it’s hard to remember what happened next.  I remember at some point looking up and Wolf was in the middle of the whole Shitshow smiling with his arm around Lamb.

And I remember sometime later waking up on the hard living room floor, and my head was right next to Emperor Penguin’s.

“Hey, Where-ThePlains-Meet-TheMountains,” he said.

“What?” I said.

“You came all the way from there?”

“Yeah.”

“By yourself?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s Alright.”

“Thanks.”

 

“Hey, Where-ThePlains-Meet-TheMountains.”

“Yeah?”

“I think I’m gonna keep the band together.”

“Cool.”

“Hey… Wherethe…

“Yeah?”

“I’m shitfaced, man.”

“MeToo,” I said, and then I passed out.

7.11 – Wolf&EmperorPenguin

“Emperor Penguin,” Wolf said, “was my best friend in HighSchool.  We met in Health class.  I’d just started experimenting on my own with the basic Perceptions like Alcohol and Marijuana and discovering their many benefits.  Health class, however, was trying to teach us that any Perception was a dangerous and unhealthy mistake, which could only destroy your life.

‘Marijuana is a gateway to all the other drugs,’ the Health Teacher said.  ‘It may seem harmless, but before you know it, you’ll be dying of a heroin overdose.’

Everyone in the class was listening closely and taking notes so they could get a good grade on a test.  But there was one lone voice in the back of the class who went “pfft.” I looked back, and it was Emperor Penguin.  I didn’t know much about him, but he seemed cool and well dressed and wasn’t afraid to speak out in class.

‘That’s bullshit,’ he said, ‘I know lots of Realities who smoke Marijuana, and they don’t die.  They just think everything is greater for a little while.”

The Health Teacher wouldn’t listen to him and scolded him for swearing, but I was intrigued because I hadn’t met anyone else in person who’d had Perceptionist experiences yet.  I knew I had to approach him after class.

‘Oh yeah,’ he said, ‘they’re just trying to Train us to become Future Adults, and you can’t get a good Adult job or something if you don’t do the ‘right’ Perceptions.  I’m not going to be an Adult tho.  I’m a Reality Traveler.’

I’d never heard the words before that and asked him what it meant.

“It’s about calling people out on their bullshit so we can all MeToo over the truth,” he said and then explained the rest of what he knew.

He was young and misunderstood some things about Reality Travel, but he had the basics mostly down.  He also mentioned he was the lead singer of a band that Traveled to Realities all over Philadelphia Suburbs, both Jersey and Pennsylvania, to musically MeToo them, and he invited me to their next show.  I was scared because I’d only really Traveled to family and school Realities before, but there was something about the words “Reality Travel” that lured me in, and I decided I had to Get Out There for the first time.

Emperor Penguin picked me up and took us to the show in the close by but exciting Realities of DowntownPhiladelphia, where I’d rarely been before and never without my parents.  They were playing in some old shabby music club, and I got to hang out with the band backstage.  It was dingy and dark, and there was a pungent yet familiar smell in the air. When I met the band they were in a circle passing around the Marijuana Perception.

‘Is he cool?’ one of the band members asked Emperor Penguin about me.

‘Yeah,’ he said, ‘he’s a Reality Traveler like us.’

‘Cool,’ they said.

And then I got to join them, and as the Marijuana Perception went around I realized that it was making everything greater for all of us at the same time.

“So,” one of them asked me, “what do you MeToo via?”

I knew almost nothing about Reality Travel until that day, but somehow I knew the answer and responded right away.

‘I MeToo about Perceptions like this one,’ I said.

‘Cool,’ they said.

And that was the moment when I received The Calling.  Emperor Penguin and I went on many Travels after that and have been friends ever since.

7.9 – Wolf&WildFuckingTurkey

“WildFuckingTurkey,” Wolf said, “was my best friend when we were kids.  He was known as Little Turkey back then because he was the littlest one in our class. And I, believe it or not, before eventually growing into this lean and muscular wolf body was the fattest one. The taller and skinnier kids would always be MeNotzies to us, and we decided it was best to team up and become a pack. We knew the MeNotzies were always playing outdoors, so we would avoid them by staying indoors, where we would draw pictures of what we called The Fantasy.

We had created a fictional World, in which Evil Monsters were always trying to take over.  The only ones who could protect it were an order of heroes known as The World Wanderers.  Little Turkey and I were, of course, official members, and we had powerful weapons such as The Big Sword, The SuperBomb, and The Rice Ray (which could turn anything into rice for ten minutes) and allies such as The Animals and The Magical Fairies.  The battles were always close, but in the end we’d always win and save The World.

Right before HighSchool Little Turkey’s family moved to California.  He was my only friend, and I was very lonely after that.  At first we still sent each other pictures for new installments of The Fantasy every week, but eventually I discovered Perceptionism and Reality Travel and didn’t stay indoors and draw anymore.  I’d still talk to Little Turkey every so often, but each time he would talk more and more about things like bars and bartending and bar hags and bar brawls.  He ended up becoming WildFuckingTurkey, and The Fantasy was over.

7.8 – The Schism

Just before the Bob Marley joint got to me, a phone started ringing, and everyone froze.  It turned out to be Lamb’s.  She hadta leave The Hole to answer it, and when she came back she looked scared.

“There’s a problem,” she said.

Then she explained how her Youngest Sister just called, and they were on their way back from the concert, and her Younger Sister’s Date might be a Marijuana MeNotzie who might try to Dominate us or even go to War if he knew the Perceptions we were Adventuring with.

“They’ll be here any minute,” Lamb said.

“Gods, no!” someone screamed.

And then everyone panicked and scrambled to escape, hide, and/or air-freshen the room.  Wolf saw me moving too slowly and grabbed me.

“Bluebird,” he said, “Do you understand how serious this is?  Marijuana MeNotzies are the worst kind of MeNotzie.  If they witness any evidence of what we’ve just done, no matter how harmless it actually may be, they will send us all to jail.  You have to stay close and follow my lead.”

Then Wolf led whichever of us he could find to get as far away from The Hole as possible.  We climbed up the stairs and got to the living room and tried to act like what you’d act like if you hadn’t just been smoking Marijuana Perception. Suddenly the doorbell rang, and we all just looked at it.

“If we weren’t in Marijuana Perception,” Wolf said, “we’d answer the door, right?”

We nodded, and then he bravely volunteered. As soon as he put his hand on the knob, the door suddenly flung open, and Lamb’s Youngest Sister burst thru and shouted “Oh my god!”  And all of us had to try hard not to flinch and duck.

“Emperor Penguin is a total RockStar!” she said.

Then he came thru the door still in his golden bowtie tuxedo, followed by two other Realities wearing their own black bowtie tuxedos.  One carried a guitar case and the other carried a bongo drum.

After them was Lamb’s Younger Sister and her supposedly MeNotzie date.  I thought he was going to look like an armed and bulletproof trooper from the Perception Enforcement Agency, but he actually looked like a smooth-faced, bald-headed Baby, who might have a diaper underneath his sweat-shirt and jeans.

“Where is everyone?” Emperor Penguin asked Wolf. “Weren’t there more Realities coming from The Wedding?”

Wolf’s face got even paler, and it was hard for him to come up with words.

“Um, well, ya know,” he said.

“I don’t really care,” Emperor Penguin said.  “Where’s the Alcohol?”

Again Wolf had trouble speaking.

“Um,” he said and shrugged.

“You’re like this Star Perceptionist, and you don’t know where the Alcohol is?”

It was almost as if Wolf was freezing up like me with New Realities.  I wanted to follow his lead, but there was no lead to follow.  I didn’t want to talk to Emperor Penguin ever, but I felt I hadta do something.

“I know where it is,” I said.

“Why didn’t you say so, Colorado?” he said.

Then I took him and his band of Penguins into the kitchen where we’d left The Stash.  A few other Realities in there had already discovered it on their own.

“Gobble, gobble, gobble,” one of them said.  “Welcome to the fucking Alcohol Party!”

His face was reddish, and he had a big hanging adam’s apple, and he wore a brown suit with the collar popped up.

“Who are you again?” Emperor Penguin asked him.  “Turkey Dinner?”

“No, man” he said.  “I’m WildFuckingTurkey.”

“Hey,” he said turning to me.  “Fuck that weed shit earlier, right?  I saw this Stash and just wanted to get super fucking drunk from the start.”

“I know, MeToo!” I said.

Then he told us all how he’s a bartender from the far off and exciting Realities of Hollywood, California and how he’d make us whatever drinks we wanted.

“Great!” I said.  “I wanna JacknDrPepper with cherries.”

“Pff,” Emperor Penguin said.

“I know,” I sighed, “the cherries.”

“No, the whole thing’s a kid’s drink, Colorado.  Adults drink their bourbon straight.  Or better yet their scotch straight.”

Then he had WildFuckingTurkey pour him and his band nothing but scotch and ice cubes in a little glasses.  I wondered why a Reality Traveler like him would want to do anything like an Adult, but him and his band disappeared back in the living room before they explained anything.

“Don’t worry about their bullshit,” WildFuckingTurkey said.  “I say any fucking Alcohol is good Alcohol.”

Then he took the biggest glass he could find, and filled it up with way more Jack Daniels than Dr. Pepper.

“I’m gonna get you fucking wasted tonight, man!” he said.

“Alright!” I said, and we toasted.

Then WildFuckingTurkey started strutting around the kitchen, bobbing his head, and telling all of us in the room about what it was like in Hollywood.

“Celebrities are fucking everywhere there, dude,” he said. “One time the guy who fucking played Crocodile Dundee came into my bar.”

“What?!” I said.  “No way!”

“Long story fucking short, some fucker at the bar starts fucking with Dundee, ya know with some fucking “you call that a fucking knife,” tough guy shit, and ends up taking a swing at him.  Dude is totally wasted, of fucking course, and misses, but Dundee doesn’t even flinch.  He punches him right back in the face and fucking knocks him out cold.  He was a good dude.”

“Wow,” we all said.

Then Wolf came in stumbling and dazed.

“Wolf, you recently married fucker,” WildFuckingTurkey said.  “Let me make you a fucking drink.”

“Are all the Realities here in Alcohol Perception?” he asked us.

“Fuck yeah,” we said.

“Oh no,” Wolf said, holding his head.

“What’s wrong?” I said, and then he took me aside.

“Bluebird,” he said.  “I’ve just done a little reconnaissance of the situation here, and it’s not good.  There’s been a Reality Schism, and The AfterParty has split into at least three major factions.  Scorpion and the Marijuana Realities are hiding out in a secret underground bunker known as Beyond The Hole.  The Marijuana MeNotzie and the Sober Realities have taken over the living room.  Now I see you and the Alcohol Realities have settled in the kitchen. Everyone wants me to MeToo their faction at the same time, but it’s impossible.  And at the same time I’m experiencing TimeFucks everywhere.  Scorpion’s New Adult Hole has such nice marble countertops and fine wooden cabinetry, WildFuckingTurkey’s all grown up, and there’s something not quite right with Emperor Penguin, but I can’t seem to put my finger on it.  The room is beginning to spin, but not in a good Perceptionism kind of way.  I feel like I may be soon overcome with Vertigo, and I’m not sure what to do.”

“What does Scorpion say?”

“He’s not a Reality Traveler.  He thinks it should be Every Reality for Themselves.”

“Well, what do the other Reality Travelers here think?”

“Bluebird, you’re not understanding the situation.  We are the only two Trained Travelers here.  If anyone is going to solve this BoobyTrap it has to be us.  I’ll Travel back and forth between Factions as long as I can to buy some time until I can think of something, but this might have to come down to just you finding a way to MeToo us all.”

“But I don’t know how without music…”

WildFuckingTurkey overheard us just then and interrupted.

“Fuck yeah,” he said.  “It’s not a fucking party without some music.  Somebody gimme a fucking guitar.”

Then he left the kitchen to find one.

7.5 – Scorpion’s New Hole

Since Wolf had Graduated Perceptionism School, Scorpion had gotten a job, a wife, and a New Hole in Philadelphia Suburbs (Pennsylvania).  Wolf had never been there before, but we followed Scorpion’s directions.  I imagined he lived in some kinda pile of rocks or crevice in the desert or at least an unsuspecting boot, but when we got there it was actually a neighborhood of condos.  Each one looked exactly like the one next to it, and you hadta go thru a maze of identical looking streets and parking lots and landscaping before you got to one that had Scorpion’s van out front.

“This kinda looks like an Adult neighborhood,” I said when we got out.

“Yes,” Wolf scratched his chin and then held his head, “it’s making me a little dizzy.”

Then to cheer him up I showed him The Stash in the trunk.  There were two big cardboard boxes each holding nine bottles of all the different varieties of Alcohol.  Wolf looked at it and licked his chops.

“That does look tasty,” he said.

“How could Scorpion say no to this?” I said.

“How indeed… but he can be a bit of a Perceptionist Snob.”

“Oh.”

We decided we should bring it in anyway, and we all went inside. Wolf put down his box, and Scorpion and his wife hugged Wolf&Lamb, and then gave us all a tour.

The inside of Scorpion’s Hole looked as Adult as the outside.  The living room was full of furniture like a couch and a coffee table and a television.  The kitchen had appliances like a dishwasher and a microwave.  Everywhere the walls were a sparkling bright white, and there was no clutter or Perceptionist Paraphernalia anywhere.  The only strange thing was a mysterious shiny gold wheelchair hiding in a little nook under the staircase.  Otherwise it was not much different than my parent’s Nest or Kat’s parents’ place, and I wondered how such a mythic Perceptionist could live there.

All of the younger Realities from The Wedding seemed to be there already, except for Emperor Penguin, whose band apparently hadta play a concert before coming over, and Lamb’s sisters who went to see the show.  Everyone who was there hugged and congratulated Wolf&Lamb and told them how beautiful the Wedding was and apologized for taking off in the van so quickly.  No one seemed to notice I was standing there the whole time with a big box of Alcohol in my arms, except Wolf.

“Alright,” Wolf said to everyone, “it’s time to decide on the Common Perception for the night.  My fellow Reality Traveler, Bluebird here, has secured for us quite a bit of leftover Lubricant from The Wedding.”

Then he pointed at The Stash, but no one got as excited as I thought.

Scorpion stared at it, waved his tail just a little and shook his head.

“We have to choose something that all of us can handle tho,” Wolf said.  “We can’t just try to seek The Highest Most Powerful Perception tonight.”

Scorpion said nothing.

Wolf hadta shake his head like a wet dog.

“Alright,” he said.  “What do you have in mind then?”

Scorpion stared at him for a second.  “Marijuana Perception,” he then said.

“As you know Marijuana is my Preferred Perception, but I have to acknowledge that not every Reality here feels the same way.”

Wolf looked over at me.  Scorpion looked over at me too and then turned back to Wolf.

“So?” he said.

Then Wolf tried to explain the RealityFuck at hand and how important Common Perception would be.  But Scorpion wasn’t listening.  He raised one claw and pointed it at what looked like a basement door.

“The Marijuana Perception is in my Hole,” he said

“Alright,” Wolf said.  “If that’s the only thing you’re willing to Adventure with then that will just have to be The Common Perception.  But everyone has to do it together.”

Everyone agreed, and then I hadta put The Stash down and go into the Hole.

7.4 – Wolf&Scorpion

“Scorpion was my best friend at Percpetionist Training,” Wolf said.  “When I first arrived there I had some experience in basic Perceptionism – Alcohol, Marijuana, and even Acid, but it was nothing compared to Scorpion who was the most experienced one there.  He was fearless about trying new Perceptions, always speaking in class about how he’d clawed and stingered exotic and seemingly terrifying ones The Perceptionist Professor had barely heard of.  Sometimes he wouldn’t show up for class at all, and we’d find out later he’d been trapped inside some overwhelming Perception for days, yet vowed to Adventure with it again at the nearest opportunity.  I was hungry to be a Great Perceptionist on his level, and I made a point to pack up with him right away.

Soon we were on a quest together to find The Highest Most Powerful Perception.  We Adventured with everything on the Great List of Perceptions like Angel Dust, Bath Salts, Ecstasy, Ether, Heroin, Ketamine, Mescaline, Robitussin, Reindeer Urine, and at least three different kinds of glue, amongst many others. Sometimes we would even mix our own random chemical concoctions and Adventure with them just to see what would happen.  But even then we could always imagine how they could’ve been more high and powerful.

One time Scorpion came to me holding a little baggy full of some kind of black residue.

“I think we’ve finally found it,” he said. “This is an ancient Incan Reality Perception roughly translated as ‘Reality Sage.’  Their ShaMans had to go on a potentially deadly days-long journey to the greatest peaks of The Andes to find the plant, which they say can take you past The Other World to Beyond The Other World. The Perceptionism Professor warned me not to do it without his supervision, but I can’t wait.  I say we Adventure with it together right now.”

I was nervous but also tremendously excited and agreed to do it.  We went to Scorpion’s Hole in the dark wet basement beneath The Perceptionist Training School.  There we blocked out all light except for a candle.  We decided it was best not to be in the Perception simultaneously, so one could look after the other in case the Adventure went Bad.  I wanted to show Scorpion I was just as fearless as him and volunteered to go first.  He packed the Reality Sage in his beloved octopus shaped pipe we called Octobong. I took two deep drags from it and then Scorpion blew out the candle.

It was the fastest I’d ever gone thru The Veil, and at once I was running at super-speeds across The Other World.  In fact, I went so fast and so far I reached a vantage point high above it and was able to see all the Gods below, and they suddenly appeared tiny and insignificant.  The perspective disturbed me, and I wanted to come back down and go at a slower pace, but I just kept going higher and further until I wasn’t even in The Other World at all anymore.  I supposed it was Beyond The Other World, but you may as well have called it The Darkness.  There was no light, you couldn’t use any of your senses, and the feelings of the Other World became irrelevant.  I couldn’t even tell myself The Bad Adventure Mantra – It’s just a Perception and Perceptions can’t last forever, because it seemed like there was no self to tell it to.  It was like I was dead, except somehow I could still experience terror.

Of course, it was just a Perception, and eventually it began to wear off, and I fell back down out of The Darkness.  I tumbled at the same overwhelming speed at which I’d risen, and the momentum carried me straight thru The Other World to some unknown location and time in The World, where I seemed to crash down inside the body of ancient Incan ShaMan.  I was only there for a moment before I bounced back up to The Other World and then back down again into the body of my child self in a car with my family going to a shopping mall.  Again I quickly bounced out and then back down until finally it was the current me in Scorpion’s Hole.  I came back to consciousness completely shaken and trembling.  Scorpion told me it had only been fifteen minutes, but it felt like the entire life span of The Universe.  The most frightening thing was til this day I still cannot say with certainty whether I even returned to the correct body.

I told Scorpion everything and warned him that this Perception may be too high and powerful for any human to experience, but that only enticed him more to try it.  He went thru with his turn, and I watched him lie unconscious for about fifteen minutes before he was suddenly jolted awake.  I lit the candle again, and Scorpion looked startled and crazed. It took him another minute or two to speak, but the first thing he said was, “I have to go back!”

Every Perceptionist has an Edge, a Perception or magnitude of Perception to which they are unwilling to return.  It was then I had to accept that Scorpion’s Edge was different than mine.  At that moment I stopped trying to seek out the Highest Most Powerful Perception and turned my attention toward how to best use Perceptionism for MeTooing.